June 3rd 2006

copyright© don oddy

~ tough times ~

powerlessness over people places and things

Its hard when times are tough, especially hard when we are in our own hard times and then we find those around us are in the same difficulty. It feels hard not to have a deep pocket to pull out a way of helping more. These are harsh moments, and in particular when we may have had deep pockets before and been able to be generous, it feels even harder.

For me this is a lesson on a personal level about being powerless to provide and support like I was used to in other days. When all we have is our emotional support, when practical steps are needed it is the feeling of uselessness which can be so depressing. I have had to learn these feelings all too often.

In real terms though there are probably other things I can do, and can be supportive to the extent I can.

I also know how I would not ask for help in these circumstances, and how hard it is to work to any help given.

We are people with emotion and pride and all manner of experiences which either help us with aid and support or hinder our ability to be helped sufficiently to make our living workable.

Some days we get tired of eating porridge, it is however the cheapest form of food I can buy. And it does me good. Not much help to others, to advise them how I get by, it is all relative to our own situations. Some eat rice, some bread, plain staples to cover needs. Others have need which would be my wants, I understand that too. Life humbles us accordingly.

And some situations get so far out of hand we get no chance to put them right. Scraping by is just what I do, and the luxury in my life is just living this day free of one burden so I may address the rest.

Powerless over people, places and things, it is on mornings like these I can reflect and know this is so. Powerless is in my case acceptance of me and my limits, just today, not every day. For relative powerlessness changes in some respects when we have greater economic power to share and divide. Another time and place. We are all at the mercy of life, real life.

Copyright © Don Oddy