July 1st 2006

copyright© don oddy

~ lost causes ~

we don't have to fight them

Sometimes we get so mad at something, usually its something we have always felt strongly about, most often its something we have experienced before, most often its about how we are treated. We make things personal when our feelings are hurt and when the thing that upsets us is a direct challenge to our values and beliefs.

Its true we humans do get caught in battles which are sometimes big causes and most often causes which we know mean nothing but impact on something inside we are never really able to understand fully. This is usually because we experience the feelings of hurt and anger, yet are reluctant to go digging too deep in case we get even more incensed or more unable to deal with our anger. We use our denial a lot, to deal and put to the side things we have no way of dealing, because to do so makes us feel weak and inferior, or we feel less than others, as if we are insignificant. We deal through denial we are bigger than the pain felt, we suck it up and let our pride keep us strong and let whatever it is go. But more often we just store up our denial and its sometime after the events when a seemingly unrelated event pushes us over and everything we have stored comes tumbling out. We get mad!

And this is typical of us humans, we can be pushed over an edge others don’t even know we have. We are left completely out of control by something which to others is so small they ridicule us and have no idea why we react so.

When we are dealing with our own feelings, we might do well to examine what inside us is hurting, and what we cover up. The most obvious feelings are those which make us feel smaller than others. Those things which make us want to run and hide because to fight is most likely too risky.

From those who push ahead of us and behave as if we are not there, to those who reject us in some way without explanation. When we are judged on our personality and characteristics, emotional and physical, we can be overwhelmed and consumed with shame. Simply because we can do nothing about who we are. If we don’t fit because we are made up wrong, our shape, our colour, our language, our heritage, our religion and anything we hold as dear to us, what we see in our mirror, our reflection, when we are attacked even mildly, we take great offence. And one day we will snap. When we let our feelings get pushed down and hidden, when we don’t find safety and feel isolated. We store up trouble. We keep things under lock and key. We might do well to find someone and something to unlock our inner selves and let go our feelings as best we can, most often when they happen. And most often by finding a process to really clean our baggage of hateful upsets. When we learn a process of doing this we feel emptied of hurt and we feel the light touch of the day. Rather than an enormous weight we have stored which pulls us down like an anchor of a ship to drown in feelings we might do better to float away.

Most of what we experience daily, if let go daily, can leave us room to breathe good air, and not the stink of the dark of others dwell inside us waiting to erupt. When we take on others prejudice, we are falling into traps of denial. We have denial to keep us safe. As long as we release our denial with regular expression we will keep our peace of mind.

When we are alone we might do well to find fellowship somewhere. Find a friend, find a mechanism a process to let go our worries. If I am able to recover my senses faster and let go my worries as I do now, forever more then my connection to this day keeps as good as it gets, and future days are not impacted by hurts and petty things I may experience. When I keep my mind more in this day, the values and principles of my living are much improved.

When I don’t judge others for who and what they are, be they the most horrible to encounter, their impact on me is minimised. As others do this the most horrible find no expression till their expression is lost. And so prejudice takes care of itself. An ideal for long and distant futures, until then I need not be hurt by others who are bigots, until the threat is in the day and immediate.

Of the big concerns in life, of those which pose a threat to Nations and religion, it would do those who hold them most sacred to examine in good conscience their edicts and values and principles. For in those big faiths and all consuming beliefs, we can find the god of good conscience which put the frameworks of society and civilisation together. When they examine in good conscience those elements, there will be less war and less hate.

We can do so much and not more than we are able. We can be angry and be frustrated. We can accept what we have and let go those things we cannot influence. We can do this for today,

“ accept the things we cannot change, have courage to change the things we can, and develop the wisdom to know the difference”

If we move with this world as it is daily, where we do not try to control anything, people, places and things, we will find greater harmony. And where we are powerful over our choices inside, we keep harmony and peace inside.

Many search for peace and serenity, and feel they can do this through self will over elements outside us. Peace and harmony are found in knowing our right size, and that of others is equal, that our choices are fundamental, and this world and nature provide the key.

Some offer spiritual connection to our world through their religion, and the will of God.

When someone offers salvation, “God Willing”, it usually means with the will of those who would represent God.

My view? Simply this, use good conscience to go with nature, and our connection to our spirituality is more likely achieved, for Nature is creation itself, and willingness to go with good conscience and Nature attends to our spiritual connection more closely and in harmony than any principle of worship derived from the word of man. Man made words, not our world!

Copyright © Don Oddy

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