Archive October 10 2007 DonInLondon 'Day in the Life'



AA Where to Find


Archive Yesterday


DonInLondon Tube
You Tube Channel


DonInLondon Journal
DonInLondon Photo


Daily News & Links
Via My Photo Page




Independent



The Times



Guardian Unlimited















Movies In London IMDb
UK Movie Reviews
Link From Photo Page























Big Issues London











"The Big Issue"

The Big Issue Foundation's core ethos is self help. We offer support to homeless and socially excluded people who seek to gain control of their lives and help them move off the streets and into a home and a job.We work with over 2000 vendors across the UK, supporting them with a diverse program of opportunities either delivered through our own services or in partnership with specialist agencies. Each new vendor has a Needs Assessment, and from this an individual action plan is set, which is monitored in supervision sessions with support staff.





Ghandi

There come to us moments in life when about some things we need no proof from without. A little voice within us tells us, 'You are on the right track, move neither to your left nor right, but keep to the straight and narrow way.

A person falsely claiming to act under divine inspiration or the promptings of the inner voice without having any such, will fare worse than the one falsely claiming to act under the authority of an earthly sovereign. Whereas the latter on being exposed will escape with injury to his body, the former may perish body and soul together.

You have to believe no one but yourselves. You must try to listen to the inner voice, but if you will not have the expression"inner voice", you may use the expression "dictates of reason", which you should obey, and if you will not parade God, I have no doubt you will parade something else which in the end will prove to be God, for, fortunately, there is no one and nothing else but God in this universe.

For me truth is the sovereign principle, which includes numerous other principles. This truth is not only truthfulness in word, but truthfulness in thought also, and not only the relative truth of our conception, but the Absolute Truth, the Eternal Principle, that is God. There are innumerable definitions of God, because His manifestations are innumerable. They overwhelm me with wonder and awe and for a moment stun me.






















DonInLondon Week
In the Life



Email Me Here

Don In London
Not For Profit
Progress Not Perfection


DonInLondon London Times



DonInLondon - Journeyman - Listener
Writer & Commentator on Life



October 8 - 15 2007
copyright© don oddy

October 10 2007

DonInLondon - ‘Day In the Life’ What Was Eating Me Up

What was Wrong with me?

Indeed how does a person who seems on the outside to be successful and able to hold a good job down, feel like life is just impossible to deal with. How was it I felt so empty in those years to my destruction and alcoholism.

Simple

Death of my Dad, and the loss of my partner in the space of three months. That was 1991. My Dad died, fortunately the woman in my life then did not die and is happy these days I can only guess. It is not helpful to me or her to open up dialogue, because as we split, it was done for every good reason, even I could see it was so and neither of us has blame in this. Yet the utter devastation of Dad dead and my partner gone. It was too much.

Drink helped me feel the utter misery I would deny as I tried brave face my situation. As Dad could not come back, and my partner, the love of my life made decisions which meant the relationship could not be ever be mended in my eyes left me with nothing worth living for. Those were dark times. My Ego roared and my serenity was non existent for a few years as the hell of grief was all consuming.

Two elements of - A Rush to Alcoholism

The emotional loss was beyond my ability to deal with, as all grief, well it settles in.

Work and Relationships

I became a workaholic, and a nightmare in relationships. I worked as hard as I might, and just took on more and more.

At the same time I started many new relationships, so many I can cringe and look back at the man I was, shallow and desperately seeking a new lover and partner who was like the one lost. For all their charm and wonderful femininity I was not able to connect as before. Grief and denial kept me looking and made me very difficult to know.

If it was not work, it would be a new relationship, made good on good times and not in emotional security or commitment, and during those years I could not let go my partner or her memory. And it was for knowing she was out there somewhere. I wanted her back and it could not be.

As time went on, womanising, workaholic, busted inside and quite driven to fill my life with success and outward trimmings, I really never dealt with my own grief. And drink was a constant companion.

Broken Heart

My heart was definitely broken. And no amount of love could mend it. Just time. I know the girl of my dreams can never come back and am relieved these days she has a good life elsewhere. Yet love never fades with some we meet. Most likely I realise now, all we meet and form relationships with, love is constant even when we are not.

Loss of a parent and also my soul mate. She was gone and Dad, ashes.

Today

My Dad was not unusual and his drinking and fear of life rubbed off on me. Listening to others last night, they too have stories like mine. And it seems I am not alone in any of my experiences which led to alcoholism. I am glad to be in good company these days. We learn to grieve and love again as time heals and we make simple progress a day at a time.

Email to a friend:

[ Some years ago, I was given ant abuse(alcohol repellent) to take, and a friend of mine has had the implant. Living on my own, of course I just stuck it away in the cupboard and pretended I was taking it, that was a long time back. The friend with a six month implant, just waited the six months and was back on the sauce as you describe.

And of course you have hit the nail on the head, its was we do with our free time when we stop!

For me I am truly better being alert and awake and dealing with life. The gap we have though needs quality experiences to fill it.

My drinking in the end was a way to fill the actual problem, which for me was clinical depression. And actually it has been with me from birth it now seems.

I was talking to an ex soldier from another country last night and he has finally got mental health checks on the agenda for his post traumatic stress disorder caused by war experiences. He realises he needs help to get close to where other people call life normal, and also then keep with AA to tackle the drink issue. In the vernacular of the NHS, he has dual diagnosis.

And actually the interesting thing for me was always wondering why I felt below par and why others just seemed fine with drink and life.

Also the shares from others last night made clear quite a few people have attention deficit disorder which simply means we move at a rate through many matters as we approach our living. And of course seem to be off at tangents in our thoughts which can be seen by others as unhelpful.

Meanwhile it’s a day for reflection and sorting stuff after my recent move, and a surprise visit to see my mother shortly.

Quality is a key to filling our days, quality best found with a clear head for me just as it may be. And always just for today, cheers and thanks, Don]




10th October 2006 [all about last year]

Another day in the life nearly done..

And when its near the end of day, we might be more reflective as we wind down and aim for rest, relaxation, or maybe a little excitement? As we find acceptance, there is good and bad in all us good people.

My meeting tonight was a step meeting where we cover a particular element of recovery. We can become elaborate and complicated but this step, which some suggests sorts out the courageous from the less inclined to face truth. Well I reckon with the right encouragement we all have this step in us. To recognise we are truly human with every quality and personality trait, and choices made with good conscience hold us to recovery and serenity, just and only for a day. The Step, number six,

"Were entirely ready to have God remove all these defects of character."

Fatal Obsessions!

Its been an odd sort of day. I am not struggling beyond the ordinary of living at the moment and it feels a bit weird to have a day which makes no dent either way, a low or high, just sort of ok. Managing a range of diseases would be an obsession if it were out of the ordinary and I were the only one. But around this world people have bigger and better things to contend with, bigger and worse, as big as imagination. Smiles from me, we all have our defects one way or another. And the biggest one maybe is fear of fear itself. To be fearful and not understand what it is. My diseases are not out of the ordinary, or extraordinary to me, they have become part of me and I deal with them as they manifest. Not fearful, maybe a little impatient with myself, a little this or that from time to time, but right now its ok to be me.

I have been and made tea for a lot of people, coffee and other drinks as they wish. I like it, enjoy the urgency which lasts but a few minutes, and they are all happy and its done. And I have made this commitment to make the tea at my meeting tonight for a while at least. Sometimes there are 50 odd there, and most have a brew. Service its called, I reckon its more a pleasure than a service. And this comes down to how we see our world. Defects of character our subject tonight.

What I know

Put me in a situation of danger, of some concern and a need to make things right as I see them, and every defect we might consider can come into play. Mostly the inclination to take control and shape things to my view and way. And when there is danger to me, I might react as I did when a car pulls out in front of me on my bike from a side road and my anger spills out. Or more likely I am aware that they will drive their car as they do, not as perceptively as I might wish and accept their mistake is just that, a mistake.

I have every defect of character ready and able in me at any time and given circumstance I may react, rather than respond. And the biggest defect humans have today is not seeing their inside workings, their inside inclinations and their self centeredness.

Like most I like things my way, and often accept things the way they are, because that’s life. So over time I accept how life is and enjoy every moment which offers enjoyment. At the same time I do much simply because it needs to be done and that’s life. And so is depression when it grips me like a vice, there is acceptance of this too.

So tonight listening and having made the tea it was good to hear how others see their defects and what they might do. Some so literal and pernickety, some as broad as life itself, a bit like me. But overall all needing to find a gentler path to this thing called serenity.

Serenity

Is a state of mind achieved from time to time. Its not a constant for we are not expected to be serene all the time nor is it possible. We are hardly serene when faced with alarming situations and danger for example. Or maintain some state of consciousness which bears no relation to our situation!

Serenity is usually based on doing the next right thing as we respond to our living and our circumstances. By taking a view, getting feedback and feeling and thinking about what we are doing. Above all serenity is about human being. Being ourselves once we understand what we are. Equal and right sized with life, and subject to every frailty that comes our way. And acceptance is doing the right thing as we learn to make life work, interdependent with others and society. That’s where serenity keeps us secure.

Chaos and Obsessions

We have those too and we might recognise where they come from. The seven deadly sins come to mind here: Pride, Envy, Gluttony, Lust, Anger, Greed and Sloth. And of course the seven virtues: Prudence, Fortitude, Temperance, Justice, Faith, Charity and Hope.

Somewhere in all these sins and virtues comes human doings and human beings. We learn our path as situation and circumstance teach us. And our learning is as long as life.

For an Agnostic Chap like Me?

Well what am I to make of these words and the obvious leaning towards the good I might endeavour. As I have all the sins and virtues of life and living in me? What might I surmise about this particular step in recovery?

For me it is simple, and with an inclination to "good conscience", to know what is in my mind as I make my way in life. And with this inclination to good conscience as my guide to good living, then my path is made as hard or easy as I choose. Choices are made best with the benefit of time, and where reaction might make for excitement my response keeps me to my good choices and my "good conscience".

Providence and Nature

We are what we are, by the simple fact of Nature, and Providence gives us a start in our living, to the good or bad as we might view life choices. Some would suggest that a divine being is involved. And for them they will make their appeal not to good conscience, but to a God of their choosing as life offers the good and the bad.

For me, whenever people suggest God is their guide, its my shorthand for the "good collective conscience" of mankind as a whole.

God and Good Conscience

Whichever keeps us on our path to serenity in our matters of living, an appeal to God or Good Conscience offers us opportunity to consider our actions long enough if we are fortunate to come to a good choice in our life endeavours.

But for the grace of Good Conscience and a God of your choosing go I…

Overall

I am happy to be me, and let others be as they wish. I need not make my world more complicated with dreams and wishes others have for me or I to wish their lives other than what they are. Life is for living as we endeavour to good conscience or not as the case may be. Wherever we end up usually is by our own hand, providence and nature. Happenstance and serendipity, will always figure as plans turn to dust and memories make good our understanding with ourselves and history forgets us. As in all living, endings are forever. As to my defects of character, they are forever present and so are my virtues, and time, well a day at a time, and good conscience, the best is made of what and where I am, in the here and now…

-/-<>



Guardian Unlimited - Times Online - Independent Cartoons
Global News Links DonInLondon




DonInLondon - You Tube - Writer & Commentator Life Happens

October



September





















News & Media Links

Times UK -- Guardian UK -- London UK -- FT UK

NY Times US -- Reuters - CNN - Washington US

Arabic ------ Jewish ------ Russia ------ China

Europe --- Australia- New Zealand--- Al Jazeera













AA Where to Find


Front Page


DonInLondon Tube
You Tube Channel


DonInLondon Journal
DonInLondon Photo


Movies In London IMDb
UK Movie Reviews
Link Via Photo Page



























DonInLondon Journal





DonInLondon Photo















Photo Link




Model & Busker Video




World Naked Bike Ride
2007 Video Download





JK Rowling Offical site

Harry Potter Latest Film


Be Tolerant

You have the power to tolerate anyone and any situation. But tolerance is not just suffering in silence.

It means going beyond any personal discomfort you may feel, and giving a gift to whom ever you would tolerate. Give your time, attention, understanding, compassion, care - all are gifts, which paradoxically, you also receive in the process of giving.

And, as you do, you will experience your own self esteem and inner strength grow. In this way you can turn tolerance into strength.






Introvert/Extrovert?



UK Lottery

























DonInLondon Week
In the Life


Don In London
Progress Not Perfection





Archive October 10 2007 DonInLondon 'Day in the Life'





Front Page

DonInLondon Tube
You Tube Channel


DonInLondon Journal
DonInLondon Photo


Media Links News


Independent



The Times



Guardian Unlimited


Movies In London IMDb
UK Movie Reviews



























Big Issues London











"The Big Issue"

The Big Issue Foundation's core ethos is self help. We offer support to homeless and socially excluded people who seek to gain control of their lives and help them move off the streets and into a home and a job.We work with over 2000 vendors across the UK, supporting them with a diverse program of opportunities either delivered through our own services or in partnership with specialist agencies. Each new vendor has a Needs Assessment, and from this an individual action plan is set, which is monitored in supervision sessions with support staff.





Be Tolerant

You have the power to tolerate anyone and any situation. But tolerance is not just suffering in silence.

It means going beyond any personal discomfort you may feel, and giving a gift to whom ever you would tolerate. Give your time, attention, understanding, compassion, care - all are gifts, which paradoxically, you also receive in the process of giving.

And, as you do, you will experience your own self esteem and inner strength grow. In this way you can turn tolerance into strength.






UK Lottery



Introvert/Extrovert?







DonInLondon Week
In the Life





Don In London
Not for Profit
Progress Not Perfection



DonInLondon London Times Photo



DonInLondon Photo 2007




















DonInLondon - You Tube - Writer & Commentator Life Happens

October



September



UK Movies 'IMDb' Movie Data Dase















Archive Yesterday

DonInLondon Tube
You Tube Channel


DonInLondon Journal
DonInLondon Photo


Photo & Video

Model & Busker Video



World Naked Bike Ride
2007 Video Download





DonInLondon Photo Vault















Photo Vault Link


Don On YouTube

AA - A Personal View




Movies In London IMDb
UK Movie Reviews




























DonInLondon Week
In the Life





Ghandi

There come to us moments in life when about some things we need no proof from without. A little voice within us tells us, 'You are on the right track, move neither to your left nor right, but keep to the straight and narrow way.

A person falsely claiming to act under divine inspiration or the promptings of the inner voice without having any such, will fare worse than the one falsely claiming to act under the authority of an earthly sovereign. Whereas the latter on being exposed will escape with injury to his body, the former may perish body and soul together.

You have to believe no one but yourselves. You must try to listen to the inner voice, but if you will not have the expression"inner voice", you may use the expression "dictates of reason", which you should obey, and if you will not parade God, I have no doubt you will parade something else which in the end will prove to be God, for, fortunately, there is no one and nothing else but God in this universe.

For me truth is the sovereign principle, which includes numerous other principles. This truth is not only truthfulness in word, but truthfulness in thought also, and not only the relative truth of our conception, but the Absolute Truth, the Eternal Principle, that is God. There are innumerable definitions of God, because His manifestations are innumerable. They overwhelm me with wonder and awe and for a moment stun me.



Don In London
Not for Profit
Progress Not Perfection



DonInLondon London Times
Don Oddy
DonInChelsea London Times
| DonInLondon | Day In The Life | DonInLondon Photo | Don Oddy | | DonInLondon | Day In The Life | DonInLondon Photo | Don Oddy | DonInLondon Day In The Life, DonInLondon Photo, Don Oddy, Times Online, BBC Online, Guardian Unlimited, Independent Online, Movies DataBase IMDb DonInLondon Day In The Life, DonInLondon Photo, Don Oddy, Times Online, BBC Online, Guardian Unlimited, Independent Online, Movies DataBase IMDb | DonInLondon Day In The Life | DonInLondon Photo | Don Oddy | London Times | DonInLondon You Tube | London Times | Guardian Unlimited | Independent 'Indy' News | | DonInLondon Day In The Life | DonInLondon Photo | Don Oddy | London Times | DonInLondon You Tube | London Times | Guardian Unlimited | Independent 'Indy' News | DonInLondon |Day In The Life | London Times | Don Oddy | Don In Discovery | DonInLondon |Day In The Life | London Times | Don Oddy | Don In Discovery | DonInLondon, London Times, Day In The Life, Don In Discovery, Don Oddy, London Times, DonInLondon You Tube, Don Oddy You Tube, DonInLondon You Tube DonInLondon, London Times, Day In The Life, Don In Discovery, Don Oddy, London Times, DonInLondon You Tube, Don Oddy You Tube, DonInLondon You Tube DonInLondon Day In The Life | London Times | Don Oddy | Don In Discovery | World News | Movies | Live Life | DonInLondon Day In The Life | London Times | Don Oddy | Don In Discovery | World News | Movies | Live Life |