Archive October 8 2007 DonInLondon 'Day in the Life'



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The Big Issue Foundation's core ethos is self help. We offer support to homeless and socially excluded people who seek to gain control of their lives and help them move off the streets and into a home and a job.We work with over 2000 vendors across the UK, supporting them with a diverse program of opportunities either delivered through our own services or in partnership with specialist agencies. Each new vendor has a Needs Assessment, and from this an individual action plan is set, which is monitored in supervision sessions with support staff.





Ghandi

There come to us moments in life when about some things we need no proof from without. A little voice within us tells us, 'You are on the right track, move neither to your left nor right, but keep to the straight and narrow way.

A person falsely claiming to act under divine inspiration or the promptings of the inner voice without having any such, will fare worse than the one falsely claiming to act under the authority of an earthly sovereign. Whereas the latter on being exposed will escape with injury to his body, the former may perish body and soul together.

You have to believe no one but yourselves. You must try to listen to the inner voice, but if you will not have the expression"inner voice", you may use the expression "dictates of reason", which you should obey, and if you will not parade God, I have no doubt you will parade something else which in the end will prove to be God, for, fortunately, there is no one and nothing else but God in this universe.

For me truth is the sovereign principle, which includes numerous other principles. This truth is not only truthfulness in word, but truthfulness in thought also, and not only the relative truth of our conception, but the Absolute Truth, the Eternal Principle, that is God. There are innumerable definitions of God, because His manifestations are innumerable. They overwhelm me with wonder and awe and for a moment stun me.






















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October 8 - 15 2007
copyright© don oddy

October 8 2007

DonInLondon - ‘Day In the Life’ Honest is the best policy

Honesty

Sometimes we might wish to evade some questions and one was put to me directly around my financial status. So I mention it here once as its not the ,main issue for me. Financially, as asked am I always on the edge? Answer yes, as for now I must rely on the system and live on the minimum for someone in my situation. And that is as it may be.

Back to recovery!

Recovery and the fellowship is [AA - all about], all about living sober and making life work. Where the fellowship helps most is how to live with spiritual, emotional and physical well being or in our language, just plain sober!

Last night a share from someone I am getting to know. It was a real privilege to hear the story of experience strength and hope.

Highlight for me

Simply the highlight was how hard it is to admit where we are with living. We all put on brave faces and in the case of us alcoholics even in recovery, we will say we are ok when we are not. So people don’t look too deep and don’t make us rake up wounds raw enough already.

And in truth it is in resolving our honesty by sharing the wounds as well as the ok times. We get better by doing just that, sharing whatever it is and not hiding as if we have failed in some way.

Emotional and Spiritual

We need find our truth and tell another human being when we feel confident enough, as this is so fundamental to well being, its hard and difficult. We are learn as we go along to find those truths about ourselves.
Today so far?

Flu Jab, other tests to do and other matters. My appointments for medical checks this week is pretty much dominating my calendar and some other repairs around the flat. With the flu jab, I can feel its effect these days, so some rest. We never know how these things may react with other medications, I am reliant often on nurses and doctors for there memory rather than what it says on the flu jab pack. Not ideal as history has taught me.

Even specialists can prescribe contra-indicated medications, this has happened in the last few months and could have done for me.. So far not yet.

Until later




October 8th 2006

A typical Saturday for Me

And it was just that. For me a typical Saturday is about plugging myself into the day from the start. And seeing where it takes me, as long as I get a meeting in somewhere with the fellowship and if possible get to two meetings. For many this may seem overkill, and it probably would be if I got nothing from them. However I do learn a little bit more each time and I go to listen as well as share my world.

And my world started early, I had some sleep, not much, three hours, I never know why or if one day I’ll go to sleep and get about seven hours at one go, maybe I will and it will feel good. In the meantime any sleep is welcome in my world.

My folks are back and Cat sitting duties done. They were pleased and happy to have had ten days away in Crete, and I am happy they are back. We shall see each other as and when. And hearing they are fine makes me feel good. And they appreciate the help and house sitting as did the cat I feel. Animals are better with their owners there, and it can be miserable for them alone. After all they are a reflection of humans and wear their hearts on their paws usually. Pity we humans can’t do the same thing.

Human Doings

And it was to the hospital this morning for the early meeting at 8-30AM. And a good share which reminded me all about the fears I have had over the years. My shyness and how I got over it using a drink and anything to make the feelings go away, as one does. Living life fearfully as if I may be caught out, it was a way of life for a long time. I am glad to be less fearful these days. Odd really with my diseases, that life is more liveable and fears less now I face life without any filters or mood altering substances, like beer or vodka.

Odd too as I listened, that I am like many others who went through life with success and never really got to enjoy anything it gave me. Well the money helped? Not really as it locked me into a way of life I was never made for, but just got good at it.

Now my learning is another way, and facing life as it is, far preferable to other times when my life was always so edgy.

How any partner I had over the years, how they coped with me and my job and career, the big way to hide from myself and my feelings. And fear of course. How much I loved them? I did of course, and as much as I may have loved them, they were always short changed by my fears and feelings of inadequacy and my best friend, drink.

So I am learning what it is to feel as these feelings really are, the good and the crap ones and what I may do as they affect me. Only took me fifty years to learn the basics, yet so many of us never learn how to express them. Or we are so consumed one way, what we express is merely a part of the whole, and the whole is often suppressed by life itself, and our rules and boundaries of behaviour.

And in Between Morning and Evening

I tried to find a small set of speakers for the TV as its own speaker is not working too well, a quest and best done patiently, as prices are high this side of xmas, I am better to wait till new year, if the TV holds out till then.

I missed a couple of calls in the afternoon, forgetting to switch on the sound, and missed a couple of mates and a chat. But that’s life. I emailed them.

And Tonight

A great meeting at the old curiosity shop, a charity shop with a back room for the likes of me.

Again the focus on our feelings. Seems this Saturday was just that, all about feelings we suppress over the years and never really get to grips with till sobriety and our programme help us face all our nature, including fear, love and living. And I shared.

And I also signed up to do some twelve step work, which is taking newcomers to meetings around here. I hope this was a good move. But it may mean I stop sharing so much about life and meetings and such. The deeper I get involved, the more the anonymity issue raises for me. And I don’t want notoriety particularly, it serves no real purpose in our fellowship at all, as in life if ego is present, then our motives are lost to time, where esteem and confidence grow, and we work the fellowship programme, then we will work well with life. And we need no accolades!

Motives for my journal and stuff

I am always questioning my motives for things I do, and this journal is making me address issues as they come up, and sort out feelings as I go along. It is after all, my personal journey and I try to maintain a balance, where I share about recovery and keep it personal to me. I fear it could become ego driven without due care and attention to my own development.

Writing is a joy to me and writing about what I know works, to make life better, it surely is the gift to share how to live life and do it on life’s terms? I need remind myself again and check my motives as I go.

AA and its still great to be Anarchic

In the nicest possible sense, that we are individual, we all have the same set of tools and aptitudes which are shaped by our interest and opportunities. We are all equipped with the same emotions and same truths of living. And we are able to make of it what we will and through circumstances.

Freedom to choose a life, so many of us nearly ended our living and get a second go, or whatever attempt we may be currently working.

Tonight

I am peaceful in my outlook, as today has gone by without thought to change my world from real. And denial is less, and honesty improving a day at a time.

I know as any human being, how easy hard lessons are easily forgotten and I need keep going back into my fellowship as learning needs reinforcement through life and wisdom at a day at a time.

As a philosopher will tell us, we can study a lifetime to become what we are, and in this present moment make best use of what we are by just being ourselves. No simple task as we humans make life as complicated as we can and see sense eventually, just today, for now, and for a moment…

Till tomorrow, just like groundhog day!

copyright© don oddy

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You have the power to tolerate anyone and any situation. But tolerance is not just suffering in silence.

It means going beyond any personal discomfort you may feel, and giving a gift to whom ever you would tolerate. Give your time, attention, understanding, compassion, care - all are gifts, which paradoxically, you also receive in the process of giving.

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Archive October 8 2007 DonInLondon 'Day in the Life'





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The Big Issue Foundation's core ethos is self help. We offer support to homeless and socially excluded people who seek to gain control of their lives and help them move off the streets and into a home and a job.We work with over 2000 vendors across the UK, supporting them with a diverse program of opportunities either delivered through our own services or in partnership with specialist agencies. Each new vendor has a Needs Assessment, and from this an individual action plan is set, which is monitored in supervision sessions with support staff.





Be Tolerant

You have the power to tolerate anyone and any situation. But tolerance is not just suffering in silence.

It means going beyond any personal discomfort you may feel, and giving a gift to whom ever you would tolerate. Give your time, attention, understanding, compassion, care - all are gifts, which paradoxically, you also receive in the process of giving.

And, as you do, you will experience your own self esteem and inner strength grow. In this way you can turn tolerance into strength.






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Ghandi

There come to us moments in life when about some things we need no proof from without. A little voice within us tells us, 'You are on the right track, move neither to your left nor right, but keep to the straight and narrow way.

A person falsely claiming to act under divine inspiration or the promptings of the inner voice without having any such, will fare worse than the one falsely claiming to act under the authority of an earthly sovereign. Whereas the latter on being exposed will escape with injury to his body, the former may perish body and soul together.

You have to believe no one but yourselves. You must try to listen to the inner voice, but if you will not have the expression"inner voice", you may use the expression "dictates of reason", which you should obey, and if you will not parade God, I have no doubt you will parade something else which in the end will prove to be God, for, fortunately, there is no one and nothing else but God in this universe.

For me truth is the sovereign principle, which includes numerous other principles. This truth is not only truthfulness in word, but truthfulness in thought also, and not only the relative truth of our conception, but the Absolute Truth, the Eternal Principle, that is God. There are innumerable definitions of God, because His manifestations are innumerable. They overwhelm me with wonder and awe and for a moment stun me.



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