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Ghandi

There come to us moments in life when about some things we need no proof from without. A little voice within us tells us, 'You are on the right track, move neither to your left nor right, but keep to the straight and narrow way.

A person falsely claiming to act under divine inspiration or the promptings of the inner voice without having any such, will fare worse than the one falsely claiming to act under the authority of an earthly sovereign. Whereas the latter on being exposed will escape with injury to his body, the former may perish body and soul together.

You have to believe no one but yourselves. You must try to listen to the inner voice, but if you will not have the expression"inner voice", you may use the expression "dictates of reason", which you should obey, and if you will not parade God, I have no doubt you will parade something else which in the end will prove to be God, for, fortunately, there is no one and nothing else but God in this universe.

For me truth is the sovereign principle, which includes numerous other principles. This truth is not only truthfulness in word, but truthfulness in thought also, and not only the relative truth of our conception, but the Absolute Truth, the Eternal Principle, that is God. There are innumerable definitions of God, because His manifestations are innumerable. They overwhelm me with wonder and awe and for a moment stun me.









DonInLondon Life

Don In London
Progress Not Perfection



DonInLondon London Times July 17
London 'Local' Times 2007

DonInLondon - Journeyman - Listener
Writer & Commentator on Life



July 2007
copyright© don oddy

Publish July 17 2007

DonInLondon - July 16 2007 ‘Day In The Life’

Family Matters

Yes today seems to have a focus on family matters. The all too sudden death of my Sisters partner, Christopher has been very much on ,my mind.

And with matters of the heart quite prominent from last years diary (just below this entry), I am not surprised that my rose tinted glasses slipped off my eyes to reveal some less than happy truths about last year.

In essence, I was optimistic about matters of the ‘heart’ then reverting to a more profound friendship. I realise I wanted it to be so, but the relationship had no chance of surviving just that way. Friendships and connections ebb and flow as life deals new sets of cards. And as another’s outlook was changing, the changes happened rather quickly once my usefulness and connection were no longer required. And in truth I realise now the circumstances and time last year were pretty new to me just a couple of years sober.

There was much flattery and closeness and then a void I could not see beyond. And time disposed of closeness of the connection I imagined rather than experienced as time does reveal obvious truth yet again. I feel sad it all went as life has taught me so many times. Purpose and utility are not a good basis other than as an acquaintance. And we all wish to see better from fellows in fellowship, and then we realise its just as normal people experience with all our angst and our desires pretty mixed up. Sober one way does not mean sober or truthful in other ways. In many respects it just means we get to see using without filters or rose tinted glasses. I have digressed enough.

Sufficed to say the origin of the mistakes I made were in me and my outlook, less in others behaviour. I do well to check the fine and often faded print of peoples endeavours before being looped into odd scenarios. We learn eventually! And make another lot of mistakes another day..

Today

As far as I can see, its been as normal as normal can be. I saw my mother briefly this morning, and my sister has been busy with matters for Wednesday. This is still a big shock and it willl take a long time to work through. Although the initial shock has subsided there are moments of utter sadness and the horror returns and then ebbs as it does.

Tonight

It was good to be in company and making the tea as usual at my home group meeting of AA. This fellowship of men and women from every background come together and talk recovery and what is happening as the days go by. it’s a fellowship so we all identify and we all have one fervent intent, to live sober and make life in real terms go as well as it may. We encounter death too often I feel. it’s the nature of AA, the last chance saloon for most of us. We never tire of hearing the truth of reclamation. We are indeed reprieved one day at a time.

Steps and Traditions

This is the bedrock of sobriety for most of us. We come to a fellowship totally confused and really often in such poor shape we are confused.

The twelve steps and tradtions are all about changing our attitude to living and our unity in fellowship to keep sober and see life in the raw. As it is, this raw life is just what "normal" people experience daily. So in some ways we play catch up. Then we find we have unity and strength for when the fan and the crap come together, or just celebrations of sober living, anything in fact normal people experience without some mental distortion we had from alcohol.

It was all about step one tonight the powerlessness and unmanageability of life when drinking, and how we change and grow again once we put down the drink and live reality.

Nothing To Say

In good company tonight, I just liked doing the tea and coffee. I felt at home with friends and new people I meet each week as I give them drinks and make the whole welcome process as enjoyable as can be.

In the room tonight were plenty of people who have been around for decades and the chair was excellent sharing their experience strength and hope. I am taken aback often that friends I have made are constant and they are friends indeed. And its quite interesting how friend have helped me with this recent calamity. Gratitude is beyond measure.

No Whitewash

I guess what makes this all work so well, is we don’t whitewash our feelings, we encourage each other and share the whole of life’s ups and downs. We learn and become empowered to speak and let out our feelings. We make the best of everything we encounter, and we do things simply and straightforwardly. Well we try!

No one is good and there is no competition to be best when we start to get sober. And we learn to be ourselves. At least some of us do, and some like me have taken ages and made plenty of blunders along the way. Long may I keep blundering and learning.

So tonight I feel ok. Just for today.

There is optimism in the words below for last year. I fear looking back some generosity was misplaced and although I realised I was probably being used quite obviously, I let it happen. When we are needy, we don’t operate too well. And same applies both ways. So the lesson is learned. I am glad it was and maybe sometime both ways around. That I am truly powerless over and appreciate where I am today.

I need take my part and recognise the duplicity. I did indeed find myself swayed and take account of time place and outlooks then. So forgiveness follows hot on the heels of what occurred, another key in the path of sober living…




July 17th 2006

Truth is Best?

simpatico at last, now that's love ?

Depth of Humility

Humility means to understand the self and through that to understand others as well. Humility is the attitude where a person is not attached to his or her opinion and feelings. Humility is the most natural expression of truth. It helps in better understanding of truth. Humility is the basis for maintaining self-respect. Humility does not mean bowing down and being subservient to others. Humility allows us to see benefit in everything. Developing humility brings a lot of comfort and ease into our life.

My best mate, she is wonderful, and me! We have a laugh and get on so well, its hard to make out sometimes where we are with anything. And we know really… and had some odd times of late as we wondered if friendship might blossom into more than just friends. We have had these notions of what might be for a little while, and at the same time we sort of knew quite instinctively we are just the best of friends.

And is odd that where we have got to is better than physical intimacy which would have been destined for most likely a short life, as we both know the bells and sparks don’t fly where we might like. It seems we both have come to this conclusion. I did not want to admit the nature of our friendship tailed off from more physical intimacy, it was always a part of friendships in my past. But now life is different and the denial I experienced and maybe the worry I might be failing our relationship hung with me longer than I might have wished. And it’s a danger for any of us, like me and the ego thing is there now I am truthful. Thank goodness I know better these days and where ego drifts.

My friend on the other hand was quite sure from early on and only felt inclined now and then to consider evolving our friendship, and her good sense kept us on the better path, and is a mark of friendship I now see more clearly. In sobriety we are better able to differentiate and see who we keep as friends and who we might pursue as partners, and we both agreed again where we are, and relieved. Avoiding hurting each others feelings seems a very obvious worry for us both, and fortunately we have been able to get to the truth so easily was a surprise for me. I love her more in the sharing of truth and being honest. Odd how things turn out. Mind there have been times when lack of honesty and honesty near drove us apart for good.

It was a good outcome and followed on from a fellowship meeting for me this morning which seemed to deal with some of these issues we all face in being sober. There is a wilful side in all of us which seeks to have everything and we almost always end up with nothing as a result. In the fellowship meeting we all seemed to have learned to be good consumers not only of things material, we seem like collectors and pick up people as we go along and then find we have what we don’t want or have moved perfectly good friendships beyond where they last. A sad and true reflection of how we can trying to fix ourselves with love, when if we found ourselves and love inside first we might be better able to love others as we agree, sparks and all when we find our partners who ring the bells in our heads. Big smiles from me and a relief about this conundrum, it took less time to unravel and get to acceptance than I would have imagined. And there is a sort of guilty feeling in there too all mixed up with relief. And we both have these feelings going on. And we are both looking outwardly more obviously than maybe we felt able to share with each other. My God, how we dallied and actually I am glad we did. With care and attention, well enough to make the outcome good.

We will find our friendship changes as we move along, our closeness is predicated on lack of a partner in both cases and some of the closeness belongs with intimate partners as discussion of life belongs there and friendship of that sort. Friends and relationships change, its life, and as we have found honesty along the way, albeit lacking for a while in me at least and for us both in being clear on her inclinations, we got there in the end. She fancies someone else too, Phew! Thank goodness we didn’t take it further, I feel our relationship was destined for difficult outcomes as both of us are moving into changing phases. We have much to offer and give and receive everything well.

What seems to have come out of this for me is an acceptance of choices. Choices I might never have felt able to make before. It takes a good friendship to get to this point of clarity, and beyond as now appears apparent. I get it and so too my best mate in the fellowship. And I am glad she has more years sober than me in this case, and more years with clarity, which helped beyond my confusion over the last couple of weeks.

And you know what I like most is how I feel about all of this, content and peaceful, free and happy. And still there is a hint of guilt feeling this way, it’s a new way of being for me and without that old fearful needy me. As there is something there in ego in me I recognise… a man thing, a woman thing and ego thing, it is part of the package of life, and there for both of us. And I am glad to have a good friend to have helped guide me in this conundrum of living well.

I am bothered by other matters I wrote about. The rehab experience is on my mind, the outcomes for those who don't die and don’t get the guidance and support, the counsellors who lack experience beyond their own and all those things. The dead are dead and the consequences for the living are all to harsh and familiar especially loved ones and family and those like me, bothered and powerless.

I accept my powerless situation as it is and leave it there for now, but my thoughts will wander back I am sure.

We went to see "Superman Returns", after pizza today. A good laugh all the way on top of relief felt. Superman is ok as it happens, and kept my interest, I think I’d give it six out of ten. More would be too gushing, the plot and outcomes were akin to the old story, the screenplay was interestingly constructed and pretty intuitive in its leaning and the Acting was pretty good too. And the Enron connection quite obvious once you know about it.

A coffee and home and relaxing. I been and posted some photo’s of my best mate, on the photo web page, smiles hers have come out ok, mine, well never too sure of photo’s these days. So added a couple of others including the one taken by Barry Lategan some time back. it’s a bit grainy, but adequate, the best of digital photo’s can suffer when we have them scanned and then copied a few times. Never mind its still a good photo of the time and was a Fulham road composition.

Time marches on, I hope tonight the railways are quiet, its been days of engineering works going on and on and on. My bags under the eyes on my photo give away my fatigue. And a lack of sleep.. I look older today

I feel the peace is good, the acceptance fine, and freedom and contentment which comes with truth. My truth is good and intact, and hope it remains a day at a time. As to the truth of others, well its only my business when it impacts on me I guess, and where rehab matters touch me, I can comment and politics is fair game. Sorted as far as today goes. And let go and be what humility offers, and gratitude in outlooks from the heart as our hearts flourish as they are nurtured and nurturing is the key today…

Can be a bit of a free fall for the manipulators and liars I will encounter in future times, those days and times are as they will be, and me, I move along patiently a day at a time!

Copyright © Don Oddy



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Be Tolerant

You have the power to tolerate anyone and any situation. But tolerance is not just suffering in silence.

It means going beyond any personal discomfort you may feel, and giving a gift to whom ever you would tolerate. Give your time, attention, understanding, compassion, care - all are gifts, which paradoxically, you also receive in the process of giving.

And, as you do, you will experience your own self esteem and inner strength grow. In this way you can turn tolerance into strength.






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The Big Issue Foundation's core ethos is self help. We offer support to homeless and socially excluded people who seek to gain control of their lives and help them move off the streets and into a home and a job.We work with over 2000 vendors across the UK, supporting them with a diverse program of opportunities either delivered through our own services or in partnership with specialist agencies. Each new vendor has a Needs Assessment, and from this an individual action plan is set, which is monitored in supervision sessions with support staff.





Be Tolerant

You have the power to tolerate anyone and any situation. But tolerance is not just suffering in silence.

It means going beyond any personal discomfort you may feel, and giving a gift to whom ever you would tolerate. Give your time, attention, understanding, compassion, care - all are gifts, which paradoxically, you also receive in the process of giving.

And, as you do, you will experience your own self esteem and inner strength grow. In this way you can turn tolerance into strength.






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DonInLondon London Times 'Global' News July 17 2007


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Guardian Unlimited OnLine July 17 2007


Cold war diplomacy is back as UK expels spies July 17 2007




Moscow vows retaliation after four agents thrown out over Litvinenko case

Luke Harding in Moscow, Ian Cobain and Julian Borger

The British government was last night bracing itself for an inevitable diplomatic backlash after expelling four Russian intelligence officers in protest at the Kremlin's refusal to hand over the prime suspect in the polonium-210 poisoning affair.

In an attempt to underline the government's anger and alarm over the murder of Alexander Litvinenko, the Foreign Office announced it was ceasing cooperation with Moscow on a range of issues, starting with the imposition of restrictions on visas issued to Russian officials seeking to visit the UK

All four individuals being expelled are officers with one of the successor organisations to the KGB, a clear signal that British authorities strongly suspect that Russian intelligence agencies had a hand in the murder. David Miliband, the foreign secretary, told the Commons yesterday: "This response is proportional and it is clear at whom it is aimed."

Last night Gordon Brown, arriving for talks in Germany, said Britain wanted a constructive relationship with Russia, but added: "When a murder is committed on British soil, action has to be taken."

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Times OnLine July 17 2007


Labour peers named in Parliament access row July 17 2007




Sam Coates, Political Correspondent

Peers are handing out exclusive access to the Houses of Parliament to lobbyists and pressure groups, who pay them thousands of pounds a year, The Times has learnt.

A list seen by this paper shows some members of the House of Lords are giving parliamentary passes intended for researchers and secretaries to representatives of the defence, transport, freight and legal industries.

The passes have clear commercial value, allowing lobbyists the opportunity to mingle with government ministers and MPs, use the bars and restaurants to impress clients, access the research services of the parliamentary library and avoid the lengthy security queues.

While MPs have been forced to disclose the names and outside interests of their staff since 1985, peers have repeatedly blocked the release of the full list of names until a request made by The Times under the Freedom of Information Act forced its disclosure

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Just another day in Iraq: 100 more fathers, mothers, sons and daughters killed July 17 2007



By Patrick Cockburn in Khanaquin, Diyala Province, Iraq

The United States surge, the use of the American troop reinforcements to bring violence in Iraq under control, is bloodily failing across northern Iraq. That was proved again yesterday when a suicide bomber detonated a truck packed with explosives in Kirkuk killing at least 85 people and wounding a further 183.

The truck bomb blasted a 30ft-deep crater in a busy road full of small shops and booths near the ancient citadel of Kirkuk, setting fire to a bus in which the passengers burned to death and burying many others under the rubble. Dozens of cars were set ablaze and their blackened hulks littered the street. Some 25 of the wounded suffered critical injuries and may not live.

In Baghdad, at least 44 people were killed or found dead across the city, police said. They included the bullet-riddled bodies of 25 people, apparent victims of sectarian death squads.

The attack is the latest assault by Sunni insurgents on Kurds who claim Kirkuk as their future capital.

Adnan Sarhan, 30, lost both his eyes and had his back broken in the blast. He lay on the operating table as his anguished mother, Mahiya Qadir, sat nearby with her daughter-in-law. "Will I ever see my son alive again?" she asked.

Two more car bombs blew up later in Kirkuk but caused few casualties.

The dispatch of 28,000 extra troops to Iraq starting in January, and the more aggressive deployment of the US army in the country, is not working. At best it is moving violence from one area of Iraq to another. The US is allying itself to local tribes and militias against guerrillas but that is angering the government in Baghdad and deepening the violence.

In Diyala, a mixed Shia-Sunni-Kurdish province south of Kirkuk and north-east of Baghdad, the US launched an offensive against al-Qa'ida and Sunni insurgent forces three weeks ago. It claimed to have killed many guerrillas and forced others to flee.

Hamdi Hassan Zubaydi, the Sunni leader of the Iraqi Islamic Party in Diyala, painted a very different picture. He described how some of the Sunni tribesmen had joined US troops to storm al-Qa'ida-held villages and had killed 100 insurgents. But when the US withdrew, al-Qa'ida returned and drove the tribesmen out.

Mr Zubaydi, who was jailed by Saddam Hussein in the 1980s, quivered with disgust as he explained the bloody complexities of sectarian war in Diyala.

The tough-looking former teacher in his fifties said 20 Sunni students on a bus had been abducted and he feared they would be killed. He said he knew who had carried out the kidnapping: "It was the emergency police forces led by Captain Abbas Waisi and Lt Zaman Abdul Hamid. I told the American special forces but they have done nothing."

We met Mr Zubaydi in the office of the Mayor of Khanaqin, a Kurdish enclave in northern Diyala, where he had come to ask for help. We had reached there through Kurdish-controlled territory along the right bank of the Diyala river that runs parallel to the Iranian border. Kurdish control ends at a dishevelled town called Khalar where we crossed the river over a long, rickety metal bridge with old tyres marking places where metal slats had fallen into the waters below. We picked up armed guards and then circled round behind Khanaqin to enter from the east.

Mr Zubaydi had a shorter but more dangerous route to Khanaqin from a town called Muqdadiyah, a few miles to the west of Khaniaqin, which he accurately described as "the most dangerous place in Iraq". His house had been attacked five times in the past month.

He was beset by the Sunni insurgents of al-Qa'ida on one side and the Shia militia of the Mehdi Army on the other. He gave an impressive list of the Iraqi security forces available in Muqdadiyah, in addition to a US battalion, including 1,200 police and 1,600 army.

The problem is that nobody is quite sure on which side the Iraqi security forces are planning to fight. Often they do nothing: "The house of the deputy police chief is just 10 metres from a police station but somebody blew it up," Mr Zubaydi said scornfully. He ran through a list of police and army commanders in Diyala, all of whom were Shia and unlikely to help the Sunnis.

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Ghandi

There come to us moments in life when about some things we need no proof from without. A little voice within us tells us, 'You are on the right track, move neither to your left nor right, but keep to the straight and narrow way.

A person falsely claiming to act under divine inspiration or the promptings of the inner voice without having any such, will fare worse than the one falsely claiming to act under the authority of an earthly sovereign. Whereas the latter on being exposed will escape with injury to his body, the former may perish body and soul together.

You have to believe no one but yourselves. You must try to listen to the inner voice, but if you will not have the expression"inner voice", you may use the expression "dictates of reason", which you should obey, and if you will not parade God, I have no doubt you will parade something else which in the end will prove to be God, for, fortunately, there is no one and nothing else but God in this universe.

For me truth is the sovereign principle, which includes numerous other principles. This truth is not only truthfulness in word, but truthfulness in thought also, and not only the relative truth of our conception, but the Absolute Truth, the Eternal Principle, that is God. There are innumerable definitions of God, because His manifestations are innumerable. They overwhelm me with wonder and awe and for a moment stun me.




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