July 7th 2006
copyright© don oddy
~ How we are with Love ~
How we are with love is how we learn to love and experience love. Love seems to come in many forms, or we actually believe it is so until we are touched with the real love we experience again and again from those who truly love us as we are.
Strange how we view and memorise how love is to us. We keep it close and protect love deep inside. We may keep it so close we forget or never learn how to share our deepest joy. And as we keep it so deep inside where no one can touch it, we have a wall of sadness that protects so completely we are out of touch with love completely. Love does wither away as we try protect ourselves. In essence we can protect ourselves so well, our self love, our survival instinct, that we cannot express love at all. And in sadness the joy of loving is lost inside and survival becomes a bitter endeavour.
Love needs expression to keep connection, self love with practise becomes self loathing as survival makes us impenetrable and uneasy with letting expression out and nothing in to sustain what we might share.
Our deepest joy can be hidden from ourselves as we find nothing returned. When we are learning love from our parents, when we are learning as we grow the filial bonds, as develop to maturity, our love develops beyond our immediate and seeks bonds with creation. Creation drives our needs without our emotional connection as the pattern of life establishes our role in nature. Even if nature makes us incompatible with creation that love of life finds expression where it will. That love of life is not squandered it finds outlet.
As mankind is easy in loving in the main, love is our free commodity, made expensive and scarce as civilisation has directed. Civilisation and our connections to love spread and divide. We get good at embracing love and get good at repelling love. Our minds are open to every expression as nature will allow and every diversion mankind can imagine and make real. Love drifts across ego and finds rest in our truth. If we find our truth.
So many opportunities and so many possibilities, the endless connections to find joy and sadness as we live and experience our living. Love keeps us safe, and love makes us find our boundaries, we are like flowing rivers with emotions in a climate beset with storms and peace, and every condition in between.
As we develop and grow our nature and self will play their part, our nature and choice enable and disable connections as we find appropriate and we make connections as civilisations endorse and run risks where it finds fault in our expression.
So many rules and so many opportunities, so much freedom and so much beyond where expression is never sought. True love, false love, mistakes and trials and every grade and element we encounter as humans. No wonder we mask love and hide love as much as we express it.
Boundless love fires our soul, and repressed love makes us hurt so deep where love dwells, the ache can be lifetimes long.
No rules to love exist as we develop except those imposed by understanding and learning and experience. We know the love we need and yet often find denial more easy to accept for in denial our experience is less painful.
Along the way to our living and experiencing we are dealt all manner of connections, we are open appropriately and suffer inappropriately as we understand the rules we need observe in loving. We learn what we need to be able to express love as we can from our connection to others. Or we learn how not to love as are fearful of consequences like no expression returned. How we determine to love is the chance of life and where we are, and who we encounter in our endeavours.
As we learn our most complicated craft, we can find our good love and make life work, and we can find every variation of love, so we might survive. From no loving and no expression to all expressive love. We find our preferences as we go and make it work, make do and glory or shrink in our loving.
No wonder we find it hard to bond well and find our kinship our partners and our expression as we might wish, for indeed love develops as we do and with others as we find and not as we might will. Wilful love is hollow in the main, contrived and yielding little beyond our control.
When we love life we find love as unexpected and uncontrolled as it is. And the human heart which craves as no other addiction manifests our love connection as nothing else in our physical, emotional and spiritual well being. How we sustain love is written and imprinted on us as we travel our living and experience. How we accept love equally manifests outwardly on others and our connection.
We learn to be able at loving, our we learn to hide our love as denial enables survival. Do we live to survive, or experience? Our choices are never clear. Until we take to choosing a path where love flourishes as nature and society enable. We learn through a million touches and millions more to the good and survival of loving or hiding, we never know as each moment of love, character changes and evolves and our connection grows warm or cold in our living.
In our complex world where nuance and brick bats of love come our way, it is no wonder our love of ourselves and survival and loving is so much an art and science we leave it more to chance and happenstance, as purely living complicates our story more than we would wish.
And yet everything is for love and survival and nature made it so and man complicated everything with rituals endorsing and outlawing as mankind developed.
Complicated or simple, easy or hard, we find a path to loving as we can, never quite as we might will, or quite as imagination and denial might make us hope, more often made good in connection to our world as it is and we encounter.
Life is hard, and every touch and brush with life has in it both pleasure and pain, the measure either way more happenstance, our response and connection, learned and honed by environment.
Love our primary drive and reason for life beyond life, imagination, denial and wit to acceptance of current conditions makes good our enquiry and deliverance, our survival and our peace with nature and man made living. We can be as one with our nature as nature intends, where nature comports with mankind’s civilisation and understanding or we might merely survive living till we die. Love struck always, awed by nature, peace found and lost in paradise on the way to Elysium’s touch. Nowhere and forever loved in connection with creation. Our Universal truth in the only moment which counts and shrouded by memories and possibilities, this ever present, present moment of imperfect perfect. Now..
Copyright © Don Oddy